Ladyperson Bookclub: Exploring Modern Connections Among Women in the Midwest

High Priestesses of Bookclub Convene

Arriving early, I sit at the table reserved for 8. In all honesty, I arrive 30 minutes early and sit at the bar and order a very exciting gin cocktail, where I meet my bestie. I am an introvert and though I really enjoy connecting with new friends and acquaintances, it takes a lot to bridge the gap of wanting to socialize and then the doing of it. Deep breath.

I remember when I moved to North Carolina from California I found a bookclub right away. It was an incredibly bright group of young professionals: academics, educators, corporate girlies, a writer, an engineer, and a few health care providers As we met every month, we'd talk about the book, but mostly drink wine and enjoy the company. Eventually, we would throw baby showers and attend weddings, and then start to navigate the sticky parts of adulthood. Some of us would get pregnant and our babies would have playdates together.

We'd meet for juice and yoga, ice cream and sushi, Christmas parties and day drinking; Halloween was reserved for the stroller brigade roaming our neighborhood downtown. For most of us, the bookclub bunch started maneuvering spaces of identity and the growing disconnect from our twenties and the increasing grind of our thirties. There were tears for miscarriages and tears for love in the modern day. There was so much laughter and cheerleading and just having someone to talk to.

Even though I left Wilmington almost 9 years ago, I still follow the bookclub bunch. I silently cheerlead them, from my heart to theirs, and say to myself: I knew you were amazing and look what you've accomplished! I've seen the years of small wins, lauded research, and the toiling, watching your taking shit from a multitude of directions and--just look! You've grown to fill this big space, are being recognized, and you deserve every moment of it!

Percolating

A couple of years ago another bestie recommended a podcast called the History Chicks. It’s a great podcast--hi ladies! The podcast hosts, Beckett Graham and Susan Vollenweider, prepare for each episode by independently reading biographies about a woman spanning history.

The podcast consists of a conversation between the hosts, where they narrate the story of the historical figure in a conversational tone, smart, sometimes goofy, and well paced. I find each episode accessible, and I like they practice a zoom in/ zoom out method by incorporating broader thoughts about life, themselves, and other subjects they've covered.

Obviously, after listening to the equivalent of eight years of the podcast during commutes or doing dishes, some very anthropological themes bubble up in the context of women throughout time, space, and place. I’m sure you can fill in the blank about what these themes may consist of. I have to chuckle when male biographical figures are so vexed to encounter any ladyperson traipsing through their life with an opinion, talent, confidence, or any other controversial act in their own timeline. Women are best applauded for birthing babies and then buttoning up both the mouth and mind. Right?

So I'm embracing it. I want to talk more about a kaleidoscope of contemporary women's experiences that currently sit as my blindspot. I already want hear everyone’s story all the time, so this isn't that much of a stretch. What I was yearning for was an in-person bookclub to serve as a protected space where women can look out from the perspectives of other women. I wanted to talk encourage conversations about positionality, both one's own and of others. I want to talk about the things that bind us and the things that separate us. I want to be immersed in literary journeys of understanding and education, and the ways that language opens a doorway to a feeling, a knowing, an understanding.

In the middle of 2024, the screaming introvert inside of me was silenced and we created a Ladyperson Bookclub. It's formula naturally culminated in 1/2 book review and 1/2 sharing ideas and experiences. Anything but delicate, we’ve covered topics including African and Latina diasporas (historical and contemporary), mental illness, vanity, domestic violence, restlessness, and survival. And beauty and love and vulnerability and loss---all the things.

Always, the recurring theme is one of personhood, agency, and managing life in the best possible ways despite the pain and limitations surrounding us. 

The following list of what we've read from July 2024 through April 2025 are accompanied solely by my opinions. I’ll provide a proper review, as to not spoil it for anyone who wants to read and experience the following stories.

July -- I’m Telling the Truth but I’m Lying by Bassey Ikpi

A series of short essays relay struggles and themes of a first generation immigrant, child abuse, art, relationships, and the experience of navigating an often hidden realities with mental illness. Definitely recommend.

August -- Of Salt and Women by Gabriela Garcia

This fictional novel is a weaving of intersecting experiences of Latina immigrants, across generations and pays special attention to Cuba, with characters also in Central America and Mexico. It was great, and I recommend.

September -- Magnificent Rebel by Andrea Wulf

Terrible. I can’t recommend this book. Unfortunately, through this author’s style and context, the subject in this biography falls so flat, but not for a lack of material. There are so many details, it would have been better to focus on one element at a time. In brief: Extraordinarily gorgeous and wealthy British aristocrat feels restless due to her extreme boredom of being able to do literally anything she wants in early 20th century. Oy vey.

October -- Darling Girls by Sally Hepworth

Ooooh everybody like a mystery (ok I like a mystery). An easy read, well done. Touches upon the foster care system…and murder. Good book, quick read.

November -- Black Chameleon by Deborah Mouton

Whelp. The lived black female experience in contemporary America is told through a series of created folktales in prose by the author. Mouton has a beautiful and poignant expression in capturing a feeling and transmuting this essence into a poetic story. A blend of memoir, mythology, and cultural commentary, Black Chameleon weaves personal history with African folklore and magical realism to explore identity, inheritance, and transformation. Buy it, read it, and soak it in.

December -- It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover

Chick lit? Is this accurate? It’s domestic violence lite, written in a short pop-music-style novel. I would have preferred the author to go a bit deeper, but it’s the conversation the way the author intended. The movie though, woooboy—see my commentary on “It Ends with the Patriarchy.”  The film was just ok, but our bookclub meetup performed our version of Mystery Science Theater 3000.

January -- Anthro-Vision: A New Way to See in Business and Life by Gillian Tett As an anthropologist, sneaking an anthropology book in to the roster is part cringe (will they like it?), part propaganda (no, I don’t study bones or dinosaurs). Lucky fr me, it was well received and reflects the ways in which applied anthropology supports modernity spanning from financial reporting to how people use and buy products. I loved it and the from the feedback of the others, it was well received.

February -- Ordinary Girls by Jaquira Díaz A raw, lyrical memoir about coming of age amid chaos and contradiction—set between Puerto Rico and Miami, Díaz explores herself with raw introspection into the depths of her own identity, girlhood, and survival in the margins of American culture. An amazing book, an authentic perspective; buy it, read it.

March -- The Genuis of Women by Janice Kaplan

This non-fiction exploration examines why the accomplishments of brilliant women are so often overlooked—and celebrates those who defied the odds to reshape science, art, and history. Through the eyes of an accomplished intellectual and editor, it's a fresh take on how other accomplished women navigate identity and barriers. A great read and worth it, even if just to become aware of women today that may not be recognized in the wider culture for their brilliance.

April -- Proust's Duchess by Caroline Weber

A stylish, cultural deep dive into the lives of three Parisian women who inspired Marcel Proust’s characters—part biography, part social history of the Belle Époque elite. This dishy tome is dense. Surprising is the big reveal that Proust's "genius" was exposing the stories and lives of the women in Parisian high society by simply recording what was happening in his own time à la Truman Capote. He audaciously used direct quotes dfor his Duchess character in The Remembrance of Things Past. What is remarkable is that Proust encapsulates an authentic slice of France in transition: navigating the rise of industrialists (and the nouveaux riche), aristocrats weathering the waterfalls of a post-revolution evolutionary landscape, and the "losers" (that's code for us normies) who dine on their mirage.

In Closing

So why are American women flocking (back) to bookclubs? It’s not just about the books. It’s about connection, purpose, and the timeless joy of shared stories. Bookclubs are the modern village—a place to find an outlet, swap ideas, and occasionally gossip about more than the characters in the book. It's life support through the narratives that we connect with and through. And if that’s not enough, there’s always some version of a cheese plate.

Shine brightly, ask lots of questions, and continue to engage with the world around you.

—Anthro Pop