It Ends with the Patriarchy

Behind-the-scenes drama interferes with criticizing the movie during the bookclub meetup

It Ends With Us: A Story of Love, Abuse, and the Unraveling of Patriarchy - a Narrative

Colleen Hoover's It Ends With Us has become a gossip-soaked phenomenon, captivating readers with its perspective on the exploration of love, loss, and domestic abuse. The recent film adaptation, however, has exploded into a complex web of controversy and accusations, blurring the lines between the art and the artists, and raising critical questions about power, abuse, and accountability in the entertainment industry. The behind-the-scenes drama mirrors the very themes the story seeks to address.

This convergence of fiction and reality offers a unique opportunity to analyze how patriarchal structures permeate our society, influencing intimate relationships and power dynamics within creative industries. And crucially, it allows us to examine how those with influence can actively challenge these structures and reclaim narratives, even as their own actions become subject to public scrutiny.

At the center of this maelstrom is the tumultuous relationship between Blake Lively, the film's star and producer, and Justin Baldoni, the director and co-star.  What began as creative differences over the film's adaptation has escalated into a legal battle, with Lively suing Baldoni for sexual harassment.  This salacious turn of events throws the entire production into a new light, forcing us to re-examine the narrative through a lens of power, gender, and the pervasive nature of abuse.   

Lively, known for her on-screen presence and advocacy for women's rights, initially challenged Baldoni's vision for the film, arguing that it deviated from the book's core message and risked romanticizing abusive behavior. This act of defiance, particularly within a Hollywood system that often silences women's voices, was significant.

Lively's challenge to the director's authority could be seen as a direct confrontation of patriarchal norms. These norms often privilege male control over narratives, especially those centered on women's experiences.

However, the revelation of Lively's lawsuit adds another dimension to this power struggle. Her allegations of sexual harassment paint a disturbing picture of a work environment where those in positions of power may abuse their authority.  This mirrors the very themes explored in It Ends With Us, where the protagonist, Lily, endures emotional and physical abuse at the hands of her husband, Ryle.  The lines between fiction and reality become increasingly blurred, raising uncomfortable questions about the prevalence of such behavior in the entertainment industry and the challenges faced by those who dare to speak out against it.   

It's important to acknowledge the complexities of this situation. Lively's own actions have not been without controversy. Her interactions with journalists and critics, particularly her simultaneous promotion of personal brands during the film's press tour, have drawn criticism and raised questions about her motives.  Some have accused her of using the film's platform for personal gain, potentially undermining the seriousness of the issues it addresses.

This raises an important question: does Lively's entrepreneurial spirit and questionable likability detract from her message of empowerment, or does it exemplify a woman navigating a complex system while trying to maintain agency over her own career and narrative? Personalities are labyrinthine and dynamic, where one can be a saint one moment and a sinner the next.

The public's perception of Lively and Baldoni is looking rough for them both right now. Will the allegations against Baldoni cause a permanent tarnish on his image as a progressive filmmaker and advocate for social justice? Will Lively's decision to sue be seen as a brave act of speaking truth to power or as an opportunistic move to further her own career? These questions highlight the complexities of navigating public discourse in the age of social media, where accusations and counter-accusations can quickly shape public opinion.   

From an anthropological perspective, the It Ends With Us phenomenon provides a disturbingly relevant case study for examining the interplay between individual experiences, cultural narratives, and societal power structures. The book's exploration of love, loss, and the struggle for self-determination resonates with readers because it reflects universal human experiences. However, the controversy surrounding the film adaptation, now amplified by the lawsuits, reveals the deeply ingrained patriarchal norms that continue to shape our understanding of relationships, gender roles, and acceptable behavior.

As we delve deeper into these complexities, it's crucial to engage in thoughtful and respectful dialogue. Some questions to consider include:

• How does Lively's lawsuit impact the public's perception of both her and Baldoni? Does it affect their support for the film or its message?

• How do the allegations of sexual harassment against Baldoni further complicate the narrative of the film and its exploration of abuse?

• How can we use this story as a springboard for critical conversations about consent, power dynamics, and accountability in the entertainment industry and beyond?

**I feel compelled to make an edit as newly unveiled receipts, lawsuits, and countersuits are being reported by both parties now on a daily basis. It's impossible to ascertain the Truth of the situation, but from this outsider's perspective, it seems that collaboration and power sharing was challenging for both individuals (and their proxies). Lively may have approached the situation with overwhelming force, insisting on creative and professional input at every turn. On the other hand, Baldoni might have felt powerless to her demands and felt trapped due to proximity and dependance of her star power for this project. Regardless of his feelings, resorting to demeaning and humiliating manipulation tactics in an attempt to regain the authority he believed he was entitled to should be non-negotiable. This was a poor personality match with each side feeling threatened by the other and it shows. The desperation continues to mount as each party attempts to prove to the public—and the law—whose fault "this" is.

While navigating power struggles in the workplace can evoke a deeply emotional frustration, it does not justify retaliatory actions that cross ethical or legal boundaries. Sexual harassment, in any context, is a grave offense and cannot be excused as a reaction to steamrolling or unprofessionalism. Suppose the roles were reversed, with Blake Lively as the director and co-lead with Justin Baldoni as the lead actor. Would it be acceptable for him to contact her personal trainer to criticize her physique or lament her age? Such behavior would be universally condemned.

This raises an obvious question: Did Baldoni’s response stem not just from workplace conflict, but also from gendered assumptions about how to address challenges with a female colleague? Would he have reacted similarly if the director had been a man? Has Baldoni exhibited this type of retaliatory behavior with other coworkers, or does this incident reflect a deeper issue with gender bias in conflict resolution?

Rather than resorting to personal attacks, Baldoni could have embraced constructive alternatives, such as seeking mediation, engaging in open dialogue, or involving neutral parties to navigate workplace difficulties. These missed opportunities underscore the importance of addressing conflicts with professionalism and respect, particularly when gender dynamics may complicate perceptions of power and accountability.**

By analyzing It Ends With Us from a cultural multi-faceted perspective, we can better talk about the complex ways power functions in our society. The most valuable part of taking apart these kinds of pop culture stories is that it prompts us to question our assumptions and engage in deeper scrutiny. It emphasizes that power dynamics exist even in environments perceived as liberated, creative, and collaborative, among those who appear to have a high level of agency.

Shine brightly and ask lots of questions until we meet again.

-Anthro Pop